


sleeping with monsters

by gigglesandfreckles



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Grandmaster & Grandpadawan Bonding, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Platonic Cuddling (kind of), Post-Padawan Lost Arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:55:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27256039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gigglesandfreckles/pseuds/gigglesandfreckles
Summary: Ahsoka wasn’t sure if she knew any Jedi who loved being a Jedi as much as Obi-Wan did. She’d lost count of the times she had watched him sacrifice everything for the sake of someone else. In fact, she couldn’t think of a single time he hadn’t been the first in line to give up whatever was necessary to help someone in need.He was so thoroughly good.[or Ahsoka is having a hard time sleeping after her time on Felucia and Obi-Wan offers a solution]
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 21
Kudos: 318





	sleeping with monsters

**Author's Note:**

> I just love them a lot, OKAY?!?!?!?!?!?!
> 
> and this is largely inspired by memories of sitting at my grandpa's house and watching him grade papers of his students. I was always so entranced by how much he cared about his students and how diligently he completed his work. I used to sit at the kitchen table and just watch him in silence and admiration and think "I love him so much and he's MY grandpa!!!!!!"

She hadn’t meant to get used to it.

She was fifteen standard years old and _far_ removed from the years of crawling in the creche-masters’ beds for warmth when she first got to the Temple.

But even so–

“You should stop drinking that.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s got caffeine in it and that’s your fourth cup.”

“That’s _your sixth cup, at least_ ,” Ahsoka pointed out.

“Well, that’s just beside the point,” said Obi-Wan, even while pulling the cup of tea closer to him.

She rolled her eyes, making a point of adding _extra sugar_ to this cup. Obi-Wan scoffed in disapproval. 

“What are you even working on?” she asked.

“I told you, the–”

“Don’t say briefing reports.”

“Briefing reports.”

“ _Master Kenobi_ ,” she whined. “Anakin said those weren’t due for three rotations!”

“I wouldn’t take advice on completing paperwork from _Anakin_.”

“You’re supposed to be resting.”

“I am,” he said simply. “See the tea? See the blanket?”

Ahsoka sighed, standing from the chair and doing another lap around the room. She had her own blanket wrapped around her shoulders and the tea warmed her hands. Obi-Wan always kept his quarters particularly cold, but she enjoyed the chance to steal one of his soft blankets.

His room was _so_ different from Anakin’s. Not surprisingly, neither of them were clean, but the contents of their messes were entirely different. While Anakin was always knee deep in mechanics in droid parts, Obi-Wan’s quarters stayed covered in papers and books. Most of them were copies of mission reports or books on philosophy, but Ahsoka had accidentally discovered his penchant for poetry once upon a time and now she seemed to find more and more loosely scribbled stanzas.

Obi-Wan’s handwriting was loopy and consistent and Ahsoka liked to trace it with her fingers. Her own handwriting was more like master’s: careless, quickly-done, and...largely illegible. She’d _tried_ to learn proper Basic calligraphy, but she found that her hands were much better suited to destroying things than creating them.

“I appreciate the company as always, Ahsoka, but...my finishing of this briefing report is not stopping _you_ from going to sleep.”

Ahsoka hesitated in her walk about the room, but managed to regain her composure seamlessly. “I’m not tired.”

Obi-Wan snorted.

“I’m _not!_ ” she cried indignantly, spinning around to frown at him.

His gaze met hers and his grey eyes _danced_ with humourous disbelief. “All right.” He returned to his work.

Ahsoka huffed, dropping back into the chair and pulling the blanket tighter around her shoulders. She laid her head on her hands and watched her grandmaster work. He had a crease that always appeared above his right eyebrow when he was particularly focused on something. And he was almost _always_ focused on something.

Master Skywalker said that Obi-Wan had totally missed Anakin falling out of a low-alt transport one time just because he’d been so focused on getting the dirt off his boots.

“You’re staring,” said Obi-Wan, without looking up.

Her cheeks heated up, but she didn’t look away. “You’ve got the eyebrow thing going on.”

At this, he glanced up. He moved his hand to the spot above his right eyebrow and made a show of rubbing it out. Ahsoka grinned in contentment.

“Go to sleep, padawan.”

“You first.”

He set his holopad down. Finally. “Ahsoka,” he said, folding his hands on the table in front of him.

“Master,” she said, copying his motion.

“You have a busy day tomorrow. Anakin gets back in the morning and if you think he’s going to let you sleep the day away just because you stayed up all night pestering a very important council member, you’re sorely mistaken.”

“A very important council member,” she snorted. “Modest.”

He grinned.

“I don’t understand why I couldn’t just go _with him_.”

“You had an exam today,” he reminded her.

She scrunched up her nose in distaste. “All the more reason to go.”

He shook his head with a small smile. “Your master may not encourage dedication to your studies, but _I do_.”

“Well, then it’s a good thing I’m _his_ padawan,” she smirked haughtily, crossing her arms over chest.

“If I’m so _awful_ , then perhaps it’s time for you to go to _your own quarters and go. to. bed.”_

Ahsoka tensed up again. “You’re not awful,” she said quickly. _Too_ quickly. Obi-Wan looked at her with a scrutinizing eyebrow.

“Ahsoka,” he said slowly. “Is there a _reason_ you’re not in your own quarters?”

“No,” she shook her head vigorously. 

“Ah- _soka_.”

Her shoulders hunched in resignment. “I don’t like sleeping in there alone.”

Obi-Wan frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I...I can’t sleep alone anymore. I just...can’t.”

“Is there a specific reason?”

“I don’t know,” she tried to shrug casually, but could already tell he wasn’t buying it.

“Padawan.”

“Since...since Felucia.”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widened. “Felucia?” He frowned again, absent-mindedly rubbing his chin. “But that was, what...a month ago?”

She gave a tiny nod.

“When you say you can’t sleep alone–what does that mean, exactly?” he inquired, leaning further across the table. “What about every other time Anakin isn’t there? Surely there have been other nights like tonight.”

Ahsoka swallowed guiltily. She didn’t want to rat out her master–and it’s not as if sleeping outside his quarters was inherently breaking the Code. It was more the fact that she had a pretty good idea of _exactly where_ he was sleeping when he wasn’t away on a mission or in his room.

“Well, yeah,” she said carefully. “Lots of them, actually. Master Skywalker doesn’t really...like our quarters.”

Obi-Wan frowned. “That doesn’t make sense. It’s the same quarters he and I used to live in.”

She waited for a moment for him to arrive at the conclusion she had brought him to without explicitly explaining it. When he didn’t say anything about Senator Amidala, Ahsoka decided to move on.

“I don’t know. You know Anakin–he’s weird sometimes. But anyway,” she shrugged, “it’s not really a big deal. I just find things to do.”

“All _night?_ ” he asked incredulously.

“I told you...I just don’t sleep well when I’m there alone.”

“Does Anakin know?”

Ahsoka hesitated. She’d never brought it up to Anakin, partly because it seemed childish, but mostly because she didn’t want him to feel terrible.

“No,” she said quietly, but honestly.

“Have you tried–”

“Meditating? Yes. To be honest, Master, I think that makes it worse. Something about opening myself to the Force right before I go to sleep, it–I don’t know. It makes my dreams more...vivid.”

Obi-Wan offered a compassionate look at that and Ahsoka felt strange. This wasn’t how she had intended this conversation to go. But her grandmaster was too smart for his own good and she should have expected something like this.

“I’m sorry, dear one,” he said and she could tell he meant it.

She shrugged. “S’okay. I’ll get over it.”

Obi-Wan pushed the datapad aside, entirely, and leaned his elbows on the table. “Ahsoka,” he said gently. “You don’t have to... _get over it._ ” He frowned slightly and tilted his head. “As a Jedi, you will encounter things that other beings in the galaxy will never even imagine. But...you will encounter them so that those other beings do not _have_ to.” At this, he offered a slight smile.

Ahsoka wasn’t sure if she knew any Jedi who loved being a Jedi as much as Obi-Wan did. She’d lost count of the times she had watched him sacrifice everything for the sake of someone else. In fact, she couldn’t think of a single time he _hadn’t_ been the first in line to give up whatever was necessary to help someone in need.

He was so thoroughly _good_. 

“That’s a big responsibility and it doesn’t come consequence free. In another time, those consequences would be...less severe.” He ran a tired hand through his hair. “Unfortunately, I cannot give that to you right now.” This time, she didn’t see his sorrow as much as _feel_ it. It was searing. “This war has taken a great many things from the galaxy. Your childhood–and every other youngling thrust into this–is what I mourn the most.”

If Ahsoka was being completely honest, she forgot that she even _was_ what most of the galaxy would consider a child. She didn’t feel entitled to that anymore. Too many planets had fallen to the Separatists while she watched, too many droids had used her for target practice–

Too many men had died under her command.

“If you didn’t loathe the night, I’d be concerned for you,” he finished.

“It’s just–” she shifted in her seat, the blanket falling from one shoulder, “I know Jedi don’t have nightmares. And that’s not really what they are. They’re...more like–”

“Memories,” said Obi-Wan.

She nodded, deep understanding passing between them.

“Well,” Obi-Wan’s eyes flickered about the room with uncertainty, “I should probably be encouraging you to go back to your own quarters and meditate.” He sighed. “The hard truth is that sleeping with your monsters is something you should...get used to.”

Ahsoka chewed her lip and pulled the blanket from around her shoulders. She began to fold it on the table in front of her. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t expected this. It’s not like her grandmaster would let her stay up with him _all night_ without being suspicious. Honestly, she was impressed she’d even made it _this_ late.

There were only a few hours until tomorrow and she’d be able to keep herself up by doing a couple laps around the Temple and catching up on her own studies, as she had the past two nights.

Ahsoka made to stand up, but Obi-Wan continued talking. “However, if you want to stay here–just this once, of course–I…” His gaze shifted around the room again, but then his eyes landed on her and softened. “I suppose that’s okay.”

“Really?” she beamed.

He rolled his eyes with begrudging fondness, motioning toward the bed in the corner of the room. Ahsoka practically _bounded_ into it.

It didn’t take long before she found her eyes fluttering closed, coaxed to darkness by the faint smell of Obi-Wan’s ginger tea and the warmth of his soft, soft, _soft_ blankets. Knowing that her grandmaster was only a few metres away was enough to push the usual fear and anxiety from her mind and replace it with feelings of comfort and _safety_.

The only thing better would be–

“Master Obi-Wan?”

He hummed in response, not looking up from the datapad he had resumed his studying of.

“Are _you_ going to sleep anytime soon?”

“I need to–”

“ _Master_.”

Obi-Wan looked up, fixing her with a raised eyebrow. She met his challenge with a determined stare of her own, hoping it communicated exactly how much she meant _business_. 

He held the stare for a moment, but, within a moment, the Great Negotiator’s resolve crumbled. 

“I suppose this isn’t _technically_ due to the council for three rotations.”

Ahsoka grinned.

He sighed, but smiled as he did. It only took a few minutes for him to turn out the lights in the room and shrug out of his outer robes, climbing into the bed next to her. Ahsoka withheld her giggle at how closely he clung to the edge of the bed.

Unlike Anakin who would have flopped into the middle and expected her to adjust to the tiny space he left her with.

“Master?” she said after several moments of dark silence.

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

A pause. “For what?”

“For caring.”

Obi-Wan didn’t reply, but Ahsoka felt him shift just the slightest bit closer to her. She fell asleep with a smile. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you, thank you, thank you for reading, kudosing, commenting, or just plain acknowledging!!!
> 
> \- Abi  
> tumblr: giggles-and-freckles


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